We all have indiscretions, but where some of us will own up to ours, others simply ignore theirs, will still see themselves as perfect, and they will continue to point the finger.
Instead of pointing the finger, or apportioning blame, we need to just accept we have indiscretions and that we're not in fact perfect. Pointing the finger in someone else's direction because they’re simply being honest about our behaviour, isn't the way to do it.
In the longer term of course, we will always get caught out. It's right to own our indiscretions. They're ours after all.
Being honest to ourselves includes being responsible for our actions and words and we should all aim to be honest.
Indiscretions are part of the human condition, but blaming others is an example of our lack of understanding of ourselves.
Sadly, I feel the majority of us choose not to understand ourselves, because to do so means facing our own demons and realities, so it's easier for us not to.
If I chose to ignore my own demons and realities and hadn't dealt with them, I wouldn't emotionally be in a position to write or run The CP Diary.
Without any form of acceptance on our part we will always ignore our own indiscretions and will continue to point out other people's when they try to tell us the truth and that's wrong.
There's no simplistic answer for our indiscretions, other than to take a deep breath and forgive ourselves for being human.
And I'm not one to blame my indiscretions and mistakes on other people, even if they do sometimes deserve the credit.
Thanks Tim. Yes, I tend to work on the assumption that if we know ourselves, we will know our indiscretions.
Whatever our indiscretions, they belong to us. I think you're right. It wouldn't be right to inflict our indiscretions on other people; even if we know we can and we can get away with it.
There are people who do that because they know they get away with it.
You're absolutely right Ilana. When we own our indiscretions we strengthen our resolve to be better and things may become crystal clear in return.
I also believe this is the right way to think. Thanks Tim.
Yes, I'm one to actually tell people that I'm far from perfect which took me a long time to acknowledge and accept!
We have an expression in AA that says, "when you're pointing one finger at other people, you have 3 of them pointing back at you!" I like the expression, 'Me thinks he doth protest too much' when describing someone who's complaining so much about the very thing that they're doing wrong.
Kind of like televangelists who get caught screwing around or politicians who get caught cheating on their taxes. My parents were great ones for ignoring their indiscretions, like my mother preaching so much about sex being dirty; and then they would sound like howler monkeys at night in the bedroom!
No wonder I have so many issues,but at least I admit them unlike so many others.
Thanks Randy. It doesn't how long it takes, what's important is that we admit our faults. As children it's always easier because we're made to admit to thing, but as adults we never admit to anything.
It sounds like your parents taught you how not to do things as opposed to how to do things. It's an odd way to learn, but sometimes it seems hard, but it's the only way.