As parents, it’s our job to protect our children and for the majority of us, we get that right. But where some parents serve to protect themselves out of selfishness, it is the children that become the victims. Sadly, the recent sad story about Sherin Mathews reinforces that view. Beautiful angel.

My writing allows me to reflect on my own childhood experiences on what I had to deal with. My thoughts right a wrong. My blogs are a reflection tool, not so others will justify themselves, but so they can look and understand at where they could have done things differently.

No child should have to deal with abuse. Children are just children; we were all once children. What we must all take from our childhood, is that it’s up to us to change the way we perceive our lives, post childhood. We cannot change what happened to us, but as parents we can change our future and become stronger for our children.

However, our life plays out, others who are responsible and accountable for their part, still very much remain responsible and accountable.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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4 comments on “Protecting our children”

  1. I completely agree. To me the most important part of being a parent is to give ourselves over to our children, selflessly. Parenting is no longer about us but about our children and protecting them is fundamental to that.

    Unfortunately and while this is no excuse I understand that some parents struggle and are themselves ill equipped for parenting. Nonetheless the job of parenting must always come first.

    1. Thanks, yes you're last paragraph sums up your response nicely and is often why children become victims of abuse.

      Sadly, some parents are sometimes ill-equipped due to their own childhoods and how they were parented. That's primarily where abuse comes from.

      Regardless of past experiences, when it comes to parenting, we must always try to do better.

  2. Yes, it would have been great if my parents hadn't been so selfish and self-centered to the point where we barely existed in their minds.

    We most certainly never asked to be born, so for them to do this to us was beyond reprehensible. They were supposed to have taken care of us and protected us from the world, but they only used us to play the sympathy card to always get what they wanted.

    People always act horrified by the way my siblings and I talk about our parents, but they didn't go through the hell that we did on a daily basis. Sadly we can't change what happened to us, but we do need to find a way to process and better learn how to deal with the memories.

    I have spent most of my life running from the past, but I'm so very tired of running from life itself. There isn't all that much of it left for me, so I need to make the best of what time I do have left!

    1. Thanks Randy. Yes, sadly some parents parent as they have been parented and therefore fail to protect their children.

      All you can do now is change what you knew to what you know now. I remember telling myself that I needed to do things differently.

      Even if parents get more right than they get wrong, as children we may still choose to do things differently.

      But in any event it's important parents protect their children. There can be no excuse for that not happening.

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