Given that everything was done for me when I was a child and I didn’t have to rationale anything, I couldn't know that I struggled with not being able to rationale.
In my childhood, I continually struggled with bad thoughts and had no idea why I could never let go of those. Looking back, I can see and understand why it was impossible for me to get rid of any bad thoughts. It wasn’t that I didn’t struggle with those symptoms as a child because I clearly did, but I had no understanding.
It’s only since my diagnosis and knowing what my neurological difficulties are that I have begun to understand why I still struggle with issues that create anxiety, bad thoughts and impulsive tendencies.
I know that I have become more adept at understanding the way my mind works, but the issues that take more working out still leave me feeling impulsive and panicky and that I will always have to deal with.
No one ever bothered to explain or even acknowledge my issues so I know the feeling. In your case it was nature, but in mine it was nurture, yet the end results were very similar.
I never understood my parents' rationale, since they never dealt with much of anything up to and including their own children. Obviously this lead to me trying to live my life, without having a clue as to how to do it.
So many things never made sense to me and still don't, but that's mostly because no one ever tried to explain them for me. We were basically thrown to the wolves and expected to survive without being shown how to do it.
This is why I have had so many issues with my rationale, so I'm pretty much going to have to figure it out on my own!
Thanks Randy. Yes, regardless of our parents, I still believe we all have the ability to be able to think things through for ourselves. Sadly, I was born not being able to process and work things out for myself, which is why I've come to rely on my intuition.
I appreciate when you say that yours was a nurture issue and that can be difficult also. Particularly when we're small and we look to our parents' for the guidance and support, for them to provide us with the tools, so that we can rationale things for ourselves. Most important.
I believe you can Randy. You have come through so many issues, as you say by your own admission and that's admirable. You never gave up. Having things handed on a plate isn't the best scenario either, because we will fail to take responsibility for ourselves.
Not being equipped makes us work things out for ourselves. That is what you've had to do and you're better for it.