I try hard every day to reduce my anxiety and low-line depression, manage tinnitus and autism, while continuing the fight to find peace after the loss of my twin. As I cope with the loss and continue to navigate my life with autism, I fight to stay emotionally strong. I push through my struggles of dealing with the same mental challenges in a world that is now forever changed.

My struggles

You may not understand the battles I fight within myself to stay strong; or the issues with tinnitus and the fight to sleep and stay asleep every night. You may not also be privy to the struggles I have to confront just to put one foot in front of the other, facing the same mental challenges again and again. But it is important to remember that whatever our challenges are, it's okay to not be okay; as long as we don't stay there. It's also okay to need help, to ask for support, and to take things one step at a time. You don't have to face your battles alone.

Trying to find the 'light in the dark'

For me and despite all of this, I try; I try to rise above, to find the light in the dark, and to hold on to hope. Hope is what started my writing journey. Just to overcome a fraction of my every day emotional challenges is a battle. Challenges are something we all may have to endure, the 'life path' never runs smooth.

Tinnitus

Tinnitus is a difficult condition to overcome, brought about through the continual stress in the months prior to losing my twin. I am determined as much as I can be – to continue to see my journey as a journey of strength and hope, even when it seems like I am fighting it alone.

My advice is to keep pushing

My advice is to keep pushing, even when it feels like the smallest victory is all that's within your reach; to keep pushing forward, even when the road ahead seems uncertain. Remember that struggles are not weaknesses; they're reminders of your strength and determination. Each of us are warriors, fighting against the odds and that takes courage.

We often have to fight that journey on our own, because when it comes to mental health, it is a journey we inevitably have to take alone.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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