Letting go of someone or something doesn’t mean we’ve failed. It means we're no longer willing to put up with a situation or issue we're not happy with.

Unfortunately, when anyone deals with someone with a terminal illness, emotionally it may often flag other issues, in other areas that they may need to address, but don’t always consciously think about it at the time.

Dealing with my father’s illness has highlighted other areas of my life that I need to address and that is what I am intending to do.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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4 comments on “Unconscious Issues”

  1. Yes, I can relate to this. I've had to learn to let go of my daughter. She is living in a less than perfect situation and she won't open her eyes and see what is really going on.

    I have to let go and just let her live her own life the way she wants. I haven't always had control of her. My mom stepped in and now she depends on her more than me.

    I have to learn to deal with that. I didn't fail as a mother I just lost control when my mom started giving her everything she wanted and still does.

    1. This must be very difficult for you Lisa. I'm so sorry you have had to experience this. If I were in your shoes I would do everything I could to get my relationship back on track with my daughter.

      Having controlling parents is very difficult, but your relationship with your daughter I feel is worth everything. When your mother is no longer in the equation you still have to be able to get on with and relate to your daughter, as she will with you.

      I would try to sort this out the best you can so that you have more control with what goes on between your mum and your daughter.

  2. Good for you to see that this is happening in your life. Once you find the problem you can work on the solution.

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