As a child, it was always important to me that I did the right thing. It didn’t matter what the right thing was, it felt wrong doing the wrong thing. What you think is right isn't the same as inwardly knowing what's right, but it helps to do what we think is right, because those things will eventually become right.
What is doing the right thing?
It’s living with a conscience and understanding that ‘little voice’ that tells us what's right. We know we’re doing the right thing when our gut tells us we’re doing the wrong thing.
How do you work out what doing the right thing is?
Well the easiest way is to ask yourself questions. Could what you’re about to do, hurt anyone? Is it fair? Is it kind? Is it something I would be happy with myself if someone was doing it to me? Will I be sorry?
The right thing is offering support when we know someone needs it. It’s having the patience and tolerance to understand another person’s difficulties, without being asked. I should think most of us will know what the right thing is, but we often don't do the right thing.
We tend to do the wrong thing when we’re struggling. The trouble is that unless we consciously make a decision to do the right thing, we will always unconsciously end up doing the wrong thing.
No one ever really fully explained the difference between right and wrong, so I had to learn the hard way!
Most of my decisions were based on what was right for everyone else and not what was right for me. There were a lot of times where I didn't do what was right and paid the consequences!
I have so many regrets in my life from not doing the right things when I really knew better, but just to keep the peace and make others happy, I did what they wanted me to do.
It's a very heavy burden to carry, so I'm having to work very hard on letting a lot of my guilt, shame and remorse go. The most I can do now is try to do the right things so I can finally have peace!
Thanks Randy, I understand your predicament, but the way I see it, this isn't your guilt. I used to do exactly the same thing around my education, because I thought it was my guilt to carry. I cannot remember how long I carried the guilt, but my education was my parents' responsibility.
I tend to work on the assumption now that I'm responsible for myself, for the decisions I make for myself, but I'm not responsible for decisions that we're clearly not in my control.
That didn't stop me doing the right thing. I was a pleasing child and would always do right by others, primarily family. Looking back I'm not sure I'd change that, but the responsibility that doesn't belong to me, that's not for me to carry.
Neither should it be for you too. With the right support I am sure you would have made different choices. Your parents are responsible for that.
My gut feelings help me smell my fellow man when things aren't quite the way they should be. It's an intuition that helps me see things differently and sometimes correctly.
If people followed the golden rules of ethics 101, right or wrong would be an easy choice to make.
I couldn't agree more. Thanks Tim.
Surely we all understand right from wrong and yet we don't always process the information in a moral way. Or is that too simplistic?
All sorts of things get in the way of making the right decisions. Looking at the world we are ruining, ignorance, money, politics and the full range of human stupidity are some obvious reasons.
Thank you, yes I couldn't agree more. I do believe it's as simple as that. We all know right from wrong, but we choose not to use the ideology.
It may often depend on our emotions and our emotional struggles. It's only when we come through our emotional struggles that we dip into our moral conscience and change.