A late diagnosis of autism doesn’t change what I've had to deal with around my neurological issues over the years, but it does mean that how I got to this place late, was never about me, but through others' interactions and opinions of me. Those close to me should use the diagnosis – to work with me – to help me adapt into my new life with an autism diagnosis. We need to be able to live our lives and we're just being us.
People's Misconceptions of Autism
There are still many misconceptions about Autism. One of the most common is the belief that those of us on the spectrum lack emotions. In reality, we do feel – sometimes even more deeply than the average person – but we experience and express those feelings differently.
In my case, alongside Autism, I also live with cerebral palsy, which affects my ability to physically feel. Where I lack physical sensation, my inward thoughts, emotions and feelings, find expression through my writing.
Because I struggle to understand or interpret my own emotions, I often don’t outwardly display how I feel. The parts of my brain responsible for regulating and expressing emotion are significantly damaged. As a result, my external responses may seem unusual or hard to read, which can sometimes cause confusion or frustration for others. But just because my emotions aren’t always visible doesn’t mean they aren’t there.
My Practical-Problem Solving Empathy
When it comes to empathy, I have empathy but not in the way others outwardly show or give empathy, but that has got something to do with the fact that my empathy is more practical-problem solving base, due to my black and white thinking.
Because of my black and white thinking, autism works on a literal platform. As a result of that I don't understand sarcasm, euphemisms, irony or certain expressions. The humour I do understand, depends on how that humour is expressed. When it comes to autism, others should want to be patient and understanding. They should also want to listen, ask and learn.
Autism isn't personal but it involves everyone around the person with Autism as well. Compassion and understanding by those people are key to both helping and coping if those interactions are to be successful.
I see it very much as a two way street but unfortunately not everyone share that view.
I appreciate your candour, but sadly that's not how Autism works. I am lucky that my Autism is mild in comparison to what others get to deal with, but given the nature of Autism, it isn't something that can be helped or compromised on.
But I do agree understanding and compassion by those without autism are key to helping someone with Autism.