Healing in the Stillness of Shared Absence

In solitude, I find a different kind of connection – one that doesn’t come from the noise of others but from my own silence, not always by choice. It’s not the loneliness I feared; rather, the place where I meet the parts of myself I’d not tapped into – I've had a lot of healing to do. 

The CP Diary is where I have found solitude and that's where I have peace. Without the distraction of external voices, I’ve started listening to my own. As I embrace the solitude, I am starting to heal. But I don't think it's just for me.

We should all come back to ourselves.

'The soul version of ourselves.'  

Losing my twin, isn't about moving on, but rather making space for both loss and grief to co-exist. I know my twin is around me, woven into the fabric of who I am. We shared a life, not always easy, but she knows now and is on board with what each of us got to deal with. Here absence has become a part of me – a silent guide, a reminder of the life we shared.

The world tells us to fear being alone, to the point where we feel we need to continue to chase connections. But I’ve learned that true connection starts with us. I choose solitude, not as a retreat but as a homecoming – for me it's a return to the most authentic version of myself.

Now, in the quiet moments, I find solitude and inner peace. Given my disability, I cannot feel or sense my twin, but I know she is around. The solitude that initially felt like a silent void has become a place of connection. It's in these moments of stillness that I remember that I am not alone. The twinness we had hasn't ended; it's simply found a new way to exist, living on in the spaces we once shared and in the silence that now holds us together.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

Most people who read this blog

went on to read these blogs next
Date 26 July 2026
Author Ilana Estelle

Living with Difference

Seen, Misjudged, Rarely Understood For most of my life, I lived in the dark. Not because I didn't know I was different, but because I didn't yet have the understanding to explain why life always felt harder than it seemed to be ...
Read more
Date 24 July 2026
Author Ilana Estelle

The Hidden Effects of Loss

Some consequences aren't immediate, they're cumulative It's five months into four years through twin loss, and I've split another tooth. On its own, it's an ordinary event. But it's an event that made me stop and look back ...
Read more
Date 19 July 2026
Author Ilana Estelle

What Writing Taught Me About Self-Understanding

How writing became more than a creative outlet When I started writing, I had no idea where it would lead. I simply needed somewhere to put my thoughts – a place to make sense of experiences I struggled to understand ...
Read more
1 2 3 681

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Subscribe to receive regular updates

Enter your details below to be the first to receive updates on new articles on my blog.