No matter how we come to lose loved ones, for many illness and grief is a never-ending spiral, particularly when we struggle to find acceptance or bring closure. Around autism, how we feel is not easily explained. Also, where others should understand your difficulties, they are often only capable of understanding from their own perspective of their relationship with that person.

Grief and Sensory Stimuli

Grief is something we all try to get to grips with, something we may struggle to manage, but around autism, it is something that is difficult to manage around sensory stimuli. When it comes to autism that ask is a little more difficult. Around grief, someone with autism might behave in a way that you wouldn’t think is linked to sensory sensitivities.

Autism and Sensory Information

Someone with autism who struggles to deal with every-day sensory information can experience information, or sensory overload, particularly around family illness, where images of their loved ones become distorted and where sensory stimuli becomes too much. Too much information or sensory stimuli, can cause anxiety and stress, which can result in challenging behaviour or even a meltdown. Some people on the spectrum may also experience physical pain. It is important to understand and not to judge.

Everyone with autism on some level gets to deal with sensory processing failure. Quirks and idiosyncrasies associated with autism are part of every day life. Around illness and grief autism traits are more noticeable. We have less ability to process information, with less ability to be able to conform to social norms around illness and grieving that others come to expect. (Source: https://www.autisticaspergers.com/)

Neurotypical grief differs from ordinary grief

It is important to understand just how neurotypical grief impacts other brain function and how autistic symptoms increase. It is also important to become aware of autistic symptoms that are causing anxiety, particularly around illness and grief for those who deal with autism. Without being able to explore these symptoms, anyone with autism could find themselves in a continual cycle of anxiety. Offering suggestions that can help with anxiety is therefore helpful.

Autism struggles

Although autism presents differently in each of us, often the bigger the situation or difficulty, the bigger our struggles become. The smaller the difficulty, the less change you have to grapple with, the easier you may find things, although having to deal with something small, can feel very big, depending on the severity of the autism.

It is important for anyone who knows or deals with someone with autism, they find ways of helping that person manage their feelings. It is important to accept and recognise anyone working with difference, large or small.