I have come to learn that I actually had four cysts removed and not three as I originally thought when I had my stitches out yesterday.

I can’t say I was looking forward to the prospect of having my stitches out, but during the week I found what looked like two new lesions on my face under the skin. They looked very similar to those that had already been removed. I thought nothing of it, but when I was at the hospital, I thought I'd ask the Consultant to take a look.

All he said was that he thought they looked inflammatory, but that if they were the same in two weeks he would be happy for me to come back and we’d reconsider. There are also questions I would still like to ask about my Cerebral Palsy, but never having been through this process before as a child has made me even more inquisitive.

Having spoken to my father this morning about Cerebral Palsy amongst other things, he made it clear he wouldn’t have wanted to know, which clearly tells me why I only found out at the age of 46. Knowing and having it confirmed has given my life a whole new meaning. I’m now seeing my world in a whole new light.

As far as my referral to a child Cerebral Palsy specialist is concerned, I will be okay if I still have no answers as long as I can ask my questions. That way I can still bring closure.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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4 comments on “Would you want to know?”

  1. I hope you get some answers soon. I am sure what's on your face is nothing more than inflammatory.

    I'm sorry your going through all of this. You're a strong person and I believe you'll be okay.

    1. Thanks Lisa. I hope I will be in a position to at least have a chance of finding out some of those answers. Thanks for your concern. It's lovely to know I have that.

  2. Information is the key here. If it brings you peace of mind, by all means go for it. Do whatever will make you feel better about your situation.

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