Over the years, dealing with a disability I didn’t know I had, I acquired a good sense of myself and although I didn’t have my diagnosis or blog until my forties, I wasn’t completely void of understanding how I presented and who ‘I was.’
My 'blog'
My blog has given me a voice, it has brought understanding in what was a difficult world for me, growing up not knowing about my disability, 'about me.' It brings an energy, it shows tolerance, on a life lived.
A Good Sense of Self is a life-long project
But having a good sense of ourself is a life-long project. It’s choosing to figure out ‘who we are.’ In a world that continues to barrage us with messages about who we should be and how we should behave, it makes it even more challenging. Fitting in without having to put the work in, is easier.
Get to know 'you'
It is important to separate your wants and needs from those of others. It is important to know yourself and to find your voice. Too often, we live in the shadows, and whilst family opinions matter, because it's human nature to care, your opinions matter more.
Build on 'your life'
We acquire a good sense of self, when we begin to build on ‘our life’ rather than trying to fit into other people’s lives, or your family’s life, your family fit into 'their lives.' It’s okay for you to think differently, it is okay to believe and stand separately; to figure out what your beliefs, values and truths are, and take out other people’s opinions.
Start working on 'you'
Where we define ourselves by the lives and imprints of others, their life becomes ours; I chose not to do that. Begin to make your own choices, instead of looking to others for an opinion, or a decision. So, start by thinking about and working on your beliefs and values; think about your opinions.
Your 'approval matters'
Start living a life that is congruent with who you are. It’s your approval that matters. I made my own approval matter, now you can have yours too.
