With a model upbringing, would we have the confidence we need to deal with today’s challenges? My answer would have to be no.

A model upbringing although a wonderful thought if you can have it, doesn’t always prepare you for the world with all of its challenges. Looking back, I believe my own childhood, with its many challenges did prepare me for life.

If I'd had a model childhood, I would have had the opportunity to build on my confidence, but I wouldn’t have had the life skills necessary to help me through my most difficult challenges. It's the difficult times that teach us how to adapt. If we all to live in a model world in the same way as our model childhoods, I am sure we would then have had problems adapting.

It’s not easy for anyone growing up in a difficult childhood, but the result is we get to learn life skills instead, which although we don’t always know it at the time, will become even more important as we make the transition.

Although I didn’t have confidence as a child, my life skills have been instrumental in bringing about a new-found confidence.

When we can see that we have the ability to deal with and bring about success in our everyday lives as the adult, with the issues we have to deal with, we begin to notch up the confidence we didn’t have as a child.

Without learning life skills in my childhood, I’m not sure how much I will have emotionally survived with everything I deal with.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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4 comments on “A model upbringing”

  1. I'm definitely more open and honest about things with my children than my parents were with me.

    I didn't have a model upbringing. My parents did every thing for me that they could and I'm sure I lacked in some of the life skills. When we do things for our kids they don't learn how to do things and when they get older they don't know how to handle certain situations because mom and dad did it for them.

    I learned how to take care of myself on my own. some of my family members are jealous of me due to my parents treating me like I was crystal and would break.

    I definitely didn't do that with my girls and I'm not going to do it with my special needs son.

    1. Absolutely! Yes when we have everything done for us, we don't learn how to do things for ourselves.

      Looking back although most of upbringing was emotionally though, I've learned such a lot. With a model upbringing you don't learn those life skills. Like you, I learned what I know on my own. Thanks Lisa.

  2. In my experience there is no such thing as a perfect childhood or upbringing and it makes me laugh to hear that some people think theirs was idyllic and Im not sure that necessarily builds a confident adult in any case.

    My childhood was certainly far from model, but it has taught me so many of life's lessons that I genuinely believe I had to experience those time to make me who I am today and I don't regret any of it at all.

    Parts of my adult life have had a greater impact on me and those times I could have done without.

    1. I agree with you. There are certain aspects of my own adult life where I could have done without the experiences.

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