We dwell and continue to pull ourselves down, comparing ourselves to others we think are perfect, with the reality being they're no more perfect than we are and we're by no means perfect. 'We can be our own worst enemy.'

The self-critical voice

Perhaps it's the self-critical voice that's defeating you before you get off the starting block, or perhaps it's about self-loathing, but not to that degree. But if anxiety or depression are reasons for the self-critical voice, you can with help, change those too. Depression comes from our inability to cope with our lives.

Depression alerts

Depression is an alert. It's the mind's way of telling you that all is not well. That what you're doing isn't working. Depression is something to endure. To deal with depression, perhaps begin to look at the key elements of why you have depression.

Depression is attached to our history

Depression is attached to a history of events that you may be struggling to come to terms with, that you've ignored or don't know you have, because those thoughts are out of reach. But if you were to look back through your experiences, you can pinpoint with work on yourself, exactly why you are depressed.

It is a cry for help

It's a cry for help, it's telling others you need help, but it is important to accept that you need help. Depression attaches itself to experiences, but it can't do the work for you, that is something you need to do for yourself. When I look back on my own experiences, it's clear my experiences were very much the catalyst for how I felt.

Depression can incorporate issues

It's the issues you put on the back burner, the issues you fail to talk about or address. It's not enough to leave or ignore those issues. We must address our issues and act on change.

If you feel you have or struggle with depression, always ask for help. Doing so can save on illness.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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2 comments on “Being our own worst enemy”

  1. Yes, I have definitely been my own worst enemy! I have treated myself far worse than any other person has, for making mistakes that have only proved that I am human.

    Choices like ending up with a woman so much like my mother, rather than even attempt to be with one who could have made me happy, are just one of so many prime examples.

    I have been so very resentful of others who seem to have such an easy time of life, when I have had to struggle on a daily basis just to survive. We had to make a lot of adult decisions with only the knowledge of children, which wasn't fair but makes sense as to why my siblings and I have ended up the way we did.

    The most I can do now, is try to work on forgiving myself for only being human and try to make the best of what time I do have left, so that I finally live, rather than just exist like I always have.

    1. Thanks Randy. Yes, the first step to any healing, is to own up to our mistakes and now how we are.

      You've done that. Now it's a matter of coming out your comfort zone on the changes you know you need to make and taking the plunge.

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