It’s true that our formative years don’t always prepare us for the life we have yet to come, particularly if we haven’t had the support, but through maturity and emotional growth, I believe we can adapt.
My sensory processing disorder ("SPD") compound my problem. Some of the bigger issues, which seem pretty straightforward to someone else, blow up 3 to 5 times more and make what I deal with look and feel bigger. It is easy for me to become overwhelmed and totally unprepared.
When it comes to the smaller more mundane every day issues I’m fine, but SPD changes how I see and interpret the world and that makes what I deal with scary. Depending on what the issue is, without a resolve I can feel panicked, particularly if I have no resolve.
Even though the issue may not seem to bother me during the day, if something is lurking about in my unconscious, it can wake me up and overwhelm me. On top of SPD, as a child, I also struggled to deal with bad thoughts.
Looking back, I can see my sensory issues were always part of that equation and although that's not something I can change, it's right that I know.
I have the same sensory issue. I tend to worry too much about some problems. I feel like there's no light at the end of the tunnel.
I wonder if it's because dealing with the physical and emotional aspects of CP is already overwhelming and any other small issues added to the equation just throws us overboard.
Awww thanks Maria. I was told by my Neurologist when I was first diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy 6 years ago... that after the initial damage, the brain rewires itself and it's this rewiring that can lead to changes in sensory differences.
What you feel and deal with Maria are real sensory issues.
It must have been very difficult for you when you had no explanation for the sensory issues you had to cope with and how you felt; and how you related to the experiences you describe. At least you now have those answers and that should go some way to helping you cope with these same issues.
I like Maria's explanation that as you are already dealing with so much; that something else kind of 'tips you over.' While I can't personally relate to that, I can fully understand Maria's description of what you cope with.
Thank you. Yes it was and still is a constant battle to keep those bigger issues that create such feelings in check.
Perhaps in another few years, people will come to understand more fully what Maria and I have to deal with. There is still very little out there that explains.
A lot of my explanations I've had to interpret myself. I believe every word.