We were privileged if our parents could afford to buy us new clothes, but the world isn’t privileged. Children aren’t always given new clothes to wear or toys to play with, and therefore sometimes have to wear second-hand or jumble sale clothes and use other children’s toys.

As a child, my parents couldn't afford much, and if there were financial struggles, they carried the burdens well, but I also didn’t know until further on in my own childhood that my clothes were bought from a wholesale warehouse.

Instant gratification

The problem with society today is we want instant gratification. We’re also more likely to want to change things from our childhood, particularly if those earlier experiences make us feel uncomfortable. We strive to have new things and this can lead to a need to want and desire attitude.

There will be many who would rather forget the past, than be reminded of it. Without dealing with the past, we can't expect to change the way we see the past, which will continue to make uncomfortable viewing. Also, having instant gratification in the present, can't help us change how we feel and see the past. In some circumstances, it can make us feel worse.

Changing perceptions

I believe that as long as we have an understanding we can change our perceptions. If our parents could have afforded to buy us new clothes they would have done. Most parents only ever want to give of their best, I believe that much is true. If that was their best it was all they had.

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Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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2 comments on “Being privileged”

  1. I guess I was one of the privileged kids. I had new clothes and toys and all kinds of things. Basically anything I wanted, but I think it was due to my parents guilt that I had an illness and they thought buying me stuff would make up for it.

    When I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes there wasn't much hope for a great life for me but I proved them all wrong. My daughter was spoiled. I couldn't have anymore children and my mother and I both spoiled her now she wants for things all the time or used to. She is living her own life now and struggling with it.

    I know what it's like to not be able to buy something new for your child. My soon to be son gets hand-me-downs that are in practically new condition and I buy at second hand stores.

    He does get a few new things though, mainly for holidays. I can relate on all accounts.

    1. I can resonate Lisa. My father used to buy me sweets, on my annual hospital outing. Although I never had much growing up, I was aware enough to know that if I ever had children spoiling them wouldn't be an option.

      Another sibling of mine has gone the other way. His children literally have never wanted for anything.

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