If we’re told something and it becomes continuous, after a while we will begin to believe that what we’re told.

For example, if we’re told we’re stupid, we’ll eventually come to believe that we are that perhaps the other person is right. They clearly know something about us that we’ve missed, which allows them to call us stupid, but how wrong we are. When someone projects their views on us, they're have already projected those same views on themselves, by calling us stupid.

As children, we don’t stop to question things; until we stop and question. The less we question or look at, the more of an emotional rut we get into, the more we will eventually punish ourselves. Although I never got myself into an emotional rut, I carried others' guilt as a child. It’s only when I began to delve deeper that I came to realise, the guilt I carried was never my guilt to carry.

Unfortunately, what we think doesn’t always end there. It’s made the more difficult when those who are responsible, don’t accept responsibility or come forward and apologise for the part they've played in our lives. We would get to have and deal with less guilt, less depression and less mental illness if others took responsibility for their actions, which do affect us.

There are always other factors in dealing with depression and mental illness including a chemical imbalance, but carrying less emotional baggage, will always help lighten the load and stop us wanting to punish ourselves.