Even if we're not defining ourselves, others are doing it for us, but we may make enough noise over the years.
It is important to push ourselves into the light so that we don’t continue to hide in corners. Without getting ourselves out there, it’s easy for us to go unnoticed, and where we choose not to make that choice, society will make that choice for us.
Even with my life and without a diagnosis, I never hid behind my physical issues. They were a part of me, but never defined who I was. I certainly made enough noises over the years.
Society is beginning to make disability more inclusive, but it's not inclusive enough, considering how many people live with disabilities. We've also got used to being sidelined and we don't always know to challenge or change that.
Anything that becomes difficult to deal with can make us hide. For a finite time that may work, but it’s not the answer, sooner or later, we need to come out of the doldrums to deal with our lives.
I have been hiding out for most of my life, mostly out of fear that some of the mistakes I have made would be brought into the light; but I'm only human and only a few people would really remember.
Of course it didn't help what I went through as a child, being buried under a mountain of guilt that wasn't mine and being made to feel guilty for wanting to live my own life.
Many of the things I have wanted to do would possibly have ended putting me out under the spotlight, but I'm sure that I would survive and even possibly end up being happy.
It isn't very pleasant existing in life and living like a cockroach, so I'm trying very hard to do things differently. One big difference is helping those who appreciate my efforts, instead of trying to help those people who barely even notice I exist.
Thanks Randy. Yes, we do tend to hide out of fear. We've all made mistakes, done things we're not proud of, but it's not for others to pass judgment and as others wouldn't want us to pass judgment on them, they mustn't pass judgment on us.
I love that you are trying hard to do things differently. Through your responses I can see that's working. Just because we have always lived one way, doesn't mean we have to continue to live the same way. We can change.
And you helping others who appreciate your efforts is the way to go Randy. Not everyone is appreciative of help, whether they notice what we do for them or not.
But what matters is what you do.
Anything that is seen to be 'different' about someone can be the source of prejudice. We live in a world where being open is still not encouraged and being different still not accepted.
But being more open might make us feel vulnerable at first, but equally hiding it can make us just as vulnerable. We have to do it for ourselves and question whether it is worth spending time with people who have a problem with that.
I agree society is becoming more inclusive and I have seen tremendous positive changes, but we still have a very long way to go.
Thanks. Yes, anyone living with a disability means prejudice may sometimes never be far away.
I don't believe though that prejudice is always intended, but when it comes to a disability not only do others have to deal with us, but they also have to deal with our disability.
They don't always know how to do that. But I do think not being open minded can make us more prejudiced towards other people. Society has a long way to go as you say.
When anyone lives with a disability they tend to have deal with people from a different side of the coin, and that gives them a completely different perspective.