In life there are certain things we cannot fix. We can’t fix our failings, or our regrets. They simply become part of us.
We may sometimes be consumed with insecurities that plague our thoughts and control how we function in our lives. We may feel overwhelmed by situations we cannot change and the decisions we wish we could take back.
Then there’s jealousy, betrayal and loss. We may learn through our experiences, there is an art to letting go and leaving those behind. We may carry the load, but what makes us different is how we choose to carry it.
For those unaffected by what happens to them, they understand the differences between what can and can’t be changed and what’s meant for them. As a general rule we tend to hang on to thinking we can make things work. We may often go to the extreme of reinventing the wheel just to make our situation work.
But if you’re hanging on and you’ve been there for some time, and what you’re trying to fix isn’t getting fixed, then it's time to re-think and move on.
Change your outlook and your outlook can change. Also, learn not to expect, you won’t be disappointed and you'll find it easier to move on.
You're right we can't fix everything and some days we can't fix anything.
The important thing is to recognise that we can take steps, no matter how small towards 'fixing' how we feel. I believe we can all do that.
Thanks. Your last paragraph is spot on. Yes, I think it's important we recognise and take steps to 'fix' how we feel.
Sadly, we don't always think about how we feel when it comes to issues. We tend to be more focused on the issue itself and how we can solve the issue and that stresses us out.
I would suggest taking a step back and thinking about how you feel, deal with how you feel, then think about the issue in hand.
One of the hardest lessons to learn, seems to be that I can't fix everything. My mother brainwashed me into doing her bidding by trying to fix her when she refused to do much of anything to help herself.
What kind of parent puts that kind of burden on their child, who ends up feeling like a loser no matter what he does? I'm sure this is why I have wasted 12 years in a very toxic relationship trying to fix it, when I shouldn't be in it in the first place.
I don't have a time machine so I can't change the past, so I have to focus on the present and what I have left of the future. Someone said that I was a great guy a little while ago, so I must be doing something right.
Thanks Randy. You are a great guy, with a chaotic past that you can move on from.
Although I never had to do my parents bidding, I have seen how that works and it's not something any child should have to do, but there comes a time in our lives, regardless of our childhood, when we must reconcile our experiences.
The sad reality is that we can't 'fix' others we can only fix ourselves. We can on the other hand, give others the tools for them to fix themselves, but it's something they must do for themselves.
I believe through all the work you've done on yourself and through the various support networks you've been a part of, you have the tools to change certain aspects of your own life.
The hardest part is the implementation, but without the implementation we don't have a life and what's past stays part of our life and that's the part we keep reliving and going back to.