Fighting my own battles came with the territory of growing up with something I didn't know I had. But perhaps that isn't so much unique to me. The human condition is fragile, we all have things that we deal with.
We all have issues, we may have anger, we all have irritabilities, we can all struggle with injustice, we can all struggle with mental health, we may struggle with a lack of confidence, our ability to rationale our experiences, we may ignore our issues, or we may look to blame others, as we fail to cope with our experiences.
We hide behind a facade
We portray a character, and spend a lifetime living behind a façade, instead of understanding and come to terms with our experiences. As a result, we can end up sabotaging our mental health, by making decisions and choices that can leave us in a worse physical, or mental state.
Mental Health affects everyone
Mental health affects everyone. None of us us are free of mental health issues. Looking back it was clear I was depressed. I wasn't comfortable with what I had to deal with around a disability I didn't know I had.
I wasn't aware of what exactly my issues were, but I did eventually equate that to 'be comfortable' I would have to change and would have to push myself, to make the necessary adjustments. It's something we should all be thinking about.
Mental health changes in Brexit and Covid-19
For many, mental health issues or changes, started around Brexit and in Covid-19. Mental health we may all fail to deal with. Our struggles will always be struggles, when we fail to deal with mental health.
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Fighting my own battles wasn't something I was allowed to do as a child, which was pointed out today. I was brainwashed into being a people pleaser, which meant that I was always making choices that were always better for other people, but rarely good for me.
I made the mistake of shaking hands for a truck that I really didn't want, but had to back out afterwards which I really hated to do. Why is it that I can't seem to just say something like no, thank you like everyone else does? Now I feel terrible and my stomach is in knots which is what usually happens.
You have been such a tremendous power of example to me about fighting your own battles which I really do need to learn how to become better at.
Hopefully there will come a day when I feel like that's OK to do, and maybe even actually feel comfortable in my own skin for once.
Awe thanks Randy. You absolutely can say 'no.' Having been a 'people pleaser' as a child and well into my twenties, you learn (sometimes the hard way) and that was true for me, but you must come first.
You also have to ask yourself wether in 10 years time you still want to be in the same position, where you continue to say yes. The clock is ticking away, because that never stops, and for anyone in this situation, we will have clocked up very little to show for our life.
I have never looked back on the changes I have made, but I am aware others would rather me have continued to be as I was, for the my transition has been too difficult, but that's on them and that has to be okay.
I repeat something my mum once said, 'you get one crack at the life thing' and she was right.
Randy, go with your gut, it will never see you wrong.