Where someone does something and it continues to be repeated without an apology and you apportion blame, it means it's warranted. You wouldn't look to blame if those you were blaming weren't responsible for the decisions they made. Where you have to apportion blame, it doesn't help where you find yourself.

Finally free to choose 

At the age of 46, and with a diagnosis, and for the first time, I was finally free to choose how I moved forward with my disability. Where decisions are made for you, as adults it is up to you to choose how your story continues and ends.

Growing up, I was aware of my environment – I could see my physical issues, but I wasn’t aware of what my mental or my emotional problems were, all I knew was that I was failing, particularly in school.

As children 

As children we're not always encouraged or supported to be instrumental in our lives, but as the adult, we are free to choose. If we don’t like what's happening, we can change and make different choices.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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2 comments on “Free to Choose”

  1. Having the freedom to choose, wasn't an option open to me as a child. I'm getting used to the idea since making wise decisions hasn't exactly been my forte.

    Also, nobody ever explained the differences between right and wrong decisions to me, so again I have had to learn the hard way. I have to try to remember that when I get to vote, I will have the freedom to choose.

    1. Thanks Randy. Yes, what matters is you got there. No matter how our childhood plays out, what matters is that we find a way through.

      As the adult, through expression of free will, we get to call the shots, we get to choose. What you had as a child is gone; you are now free to choose how you want your life to go.

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