You've probably all heard the phrase, “hurt people hurt people,” which encapsulates the idea that those who are in pain project their suffering onto others. The phrase is true. Happy people don't hurt people, instead they become peacemakers, spreading kindness wherever they can.

Happiness starts in Childhood

Happiness is feeling content – a feeling that starts in childhood and comes from self-awareness, emotional stability, and finding or having a purpose. When you feel emotionally secure, you're less likely to engage in actions that harm or hurt others. Of course, happy people are not immune to life’s challenges, because everyone has those, but happy people are better equipped to constructively process their emotions.

The Role of Emotional Health

Emotional and mental health plays a significant role in how we interact with the world in how happy we are. When you're emotionally balanced you're more likely to be patient, empathetic, and understanding – that means you're less likely to be reactive. Don't lash out in anger or frustration, instead pause, be more reflective, and you will respond more thoughtfully.

Emotional health plays a big part in how we are and how we're able to cope. Those who are unhappy or unfulfilled find it difficult to control their emotions. Instead, they may direct their pain towards others, as a way of coping. Directing ones pain onto others, doesn't excuse hurtful behaviour.

The Ripple Effect of Kindness

Happiness has a ripple effect. Consider how different the world would be if we focused on cultivating happiness rather than hurting others. We need to be grounded in understanding, compassion and empathy. There will always be challenges, conflict isn't always easy to avoid, but we should approach challenges through growth, rather than continual blame and hurt.

Cultivating Inner Happiness

True happiness doesn’t come from external achievements or material worth. It comes from the soul. Soul work is important. Practices like mindfulness, gratitude, and self-compassion can help us develop inner peace. Cultivating happiness is everyone's responsibility. It's a commitment to work on ourselves, our wellbeing, as well as contributing to the wellbeing of those around us.

A Call to Action

If you accept that happy people don’t hurt people, then the greatest gift you can give to others is for you to own your happiness. Prioritising mental health, means you create the foundation for kinder interactions and healthier relationships. It all starts with mental health and understanding, listening and being less opinionated about other people's issues. Contributing to a more compassionate and kinder world is something we should all be striving for.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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