I usually write what comes in to my intuitive mind. We all have stress, but stress isn't an excuse for the way we deal with ourselves and then go on to deal with others.
Stress may sometimes come our way, through other people's decisions (primarily in cultured families) and without us having a say or a choice in the matter. But no matter how hard it is, we can learn to take back control, so that we can continue to live our lives positively.
That in every stressful situation, in every issue, past and present there are lessons we can learn and use. Initially, we may not always understand what they are, but they're there.
It is important to seek them out.
The key to dealing with stress I believe is how a person reacts to it. If you can take a deep breath it will help calm you down. Whatever you do avoid going off the deep end. From personal experience I have found nothing good comes of this reaction. It often times makes things worse. Take a step back and think.
You are right Randy, it's how a person reacts that brings about success. We're all different though and what works for one person may not work for another. Standing back to assess one's next move is always a good place to start, depending on what the problem is.
I agree with Randy, its how we react but some situations are difficult to handle. Stopping to take that breath can be the furthest thing from your mind if someone verbally attacks you or worse, physically... if we get horrible news or are rejected by someone we love. The difference between those who handle it well and those who don't is how long they let it bother them.
I agree Lisa. It can take people a long time to work through their problems with some who don't at all, they normally just expect family to tow the line so that harmony can be introduced. They sit on the fence!
My own thinking is that just because we handle stress, doesn't mean we will handle it well, but it will probably be handled better than if we don't handle it at all because we leave the problem in abeyance thinking the problem will go away.
This I found insightful...I got news last week that my mother will need her knees replaced, probably both of them but definitely at least one. Now, I know from the way she's been moving lately that this was inevitable...she's been having trouble with it for a while. This helps soften the news. But late next month, when she does go into hospital, it will be a new family situation because there are things that I just don't do particularly well -- like cooking. I've been through this once before (which helps) and yet this feels different. Still I think she will come out for the better after wards.
Thanks David. I think we all have to work through things we don't find easy or comfortable with. It's a fear of the unknown, part of life. I believe the fear is sometimes worse than the actual experience of what we fear. Normally things work out fine.
It seems like every time things start going right there is one person in my family that will throw a rock into it and raise the stress again. Like when I tried to quit smoking, this person had something stressful going on, or created something stressful.
It makes it very hard and I use to handle stress very well but now I find myself giving in to the stress and worrying myself to death. I don't know if this person does it on purpose cause they don't want me to succeed or if they have no idea they are doing it.
Anyway, I agree with you Ilana stress is a part of life and we all have to learn to deal with it. So I guess I need to re-learn. Lisa
Lisa you will like today's journal because it homes in on exactly who we choose to spend our time with and why. As far as family are concerned, I choose who I spend time with. Just because they are family, if they are causing you stress time it's time to do something about it.