I woke up this morning with a clear mind, (which is unusual for me), but as the day moves on, so does my mind. My thoughts now go back to the last 4 months.

No choice situations

When we have no choice and know that we have to get through certain situations, we tend not to think about those. The enormity of what we're dealing with hasn’t sunk in yet, although I feel as though I'm still on autopilot.

Assaults are never easy. To some extent it has brought us closer, but other times it has divided. It brings different emotions into the equation. Those had to be dealt with. Now 4 months on I can see things clearer now.

A different normal

Things have returned to a different normal, but we still have a way to go. I am not sure how Daniel will feel getting back into his old life, but it’s something that will be good for him even if he doesn’t see it now.

None of us can change our past, but it's important to change the way we perceive our past so that we get to live in the present. I go with the thought that things in our lives happen for a reason, but even if those reasons aren’t apparent or seem clear at the time, it’s important to find a level of acceptance on them.

Invariable situations become clear when we least expect them to. It’s at this point we usually find our own level of acceptance. I hope Daniel finds his.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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2 comments on “Looking back”

  1. I think Daniel will find acceptance, but it may take a while. We do what we have to for our kids no matter the cost to ourselves. I try to move on and learn from the past.

    Sometimes that's harder to do; but we need to move on so we don't get stuck in the past and stay there.

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