There are those who genuinely want to help, those who want to help but don't know how to help and those who don't want to know what it is we're dealing with and therefore won't go out of their way to help.

On our part, it’s the not knowing, living in the dark with little to no understanding of our issue that makes what we feel and what we think worse. We can always work through things when we have an understanding on how or why something happens the way it does.

Other people's ignorance can't help us learn to live with and accept what we deal with if we are truly struggling. Sometimes it takes another person's eyes to show us a way forward, a resolve.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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6 comments on “Other people's ignorance”

  1. I think I'd rather some people not help because talking loud and saying nothing only exposes more ignorance and makes matters worse.

    We can live and accept what we have to deal with without the wrong kind of help.

    1. Your response Tim is exactly as I would have responded myself. The hard part is having to live amongst those who behave in ignorance and say nothing.

      I think you're right though, saying nothing of relevance on what we deal with just exposes more ignorance and often makes matters worse. It's easier to come to terms with things on our own, away from those who care less about what we deal with.

  2. I have rarely had bad experiences around people. Many people have asked if I needed help and I usually politely say no thank you. The only problem I have with the help and accepting it, is that most of the time people will end up doing it for you, not assisting you.

    They for the most part are trying to be kind, but they just assume that doing it would be easier and faster for both, but it takes away the challenge and growth from the experience. Takes a bit away from my self-esteem/confidence.

    1. Thanks Jonathan. I'm so pleased you have rarely had bad experiences around people, given with what you have to deal with. Although I have never experienced what you have experienced, but I am sure there are people who are only too happy to help.

      I agree with what you say about challenge. I believe challenge equals emotional growth and dealing with something like Cerebral Palsy means we need time to try to do things ourselves. Self-confidence and self-esteem, both of which are difficult to hold on to when we have Cerebral Palsy.

  3. I have come across a lot of ignorance concerning my CP. Sometimes I don't pay much attention to it, but sometimes it can be difficult to ignore it. Particularly when people seem to think if I pray hard or exercise hard I will be healed from CP. If only it was that easy.

    It hurts the most, when the ignorance comes from your own family. They should be the first ones doing whatever it takes to understand as best they can.

    1. Your thoughts are my thoughts Maria and you're right. I have come to believe ignorance starts with family, particularly as they are the hub, the first people we come into contact with through us being born, then society.

      Our struggles will always start from there. I feel for you too and hope you're okay.

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