Although I emotionally stood back as a child, I was aware of things, which I had no control over. I was dealing with something physically that didn't look or feel right and for the most part that was being ignored. I can't remember exactly how old I was when I realised things were never going to change, therefore I needed to change. What I know is that when we take control, we have a chance to elicit change.

The following steps should help:

Assess your current situation

Take an honest look at where you stand in relation to your mental health, because change has a chance to begin when you have better mental health. What are the factors contributing to your mental health issues? What patterns, habits or behaviours do you think you need to change?

Identify the areas you need to change

Pinpoint the specific issues and identify the areas you need to deal with. Think about the various areas of your life where you want to regain control. Is how you feel relating to your childhood, your past, your relationships, or your health?

Stay Flexible

Being adaptable is important in being able to navigate change. The first mistake we make is taking things personally. Not everything that happens to you is because of you. What happened to me was never about me.

If there is some feedback, remove yourself from the personal aspect of it, because not everything you are being told is based on criticism.

Break down your goals and be truthful

If you're working on goals, break those down into manageable steps so that you can tackle those one step at a time. Be truthful with yourself. If you need help ask, because another person's input may show you another perspective.

Stay Positive

It is important to remember that being positive will open more doors than it closes. Remember to tap into you. Not every day will be successful and that's okay. Tomorrow is another day to start again.

Small steps

Don't be put off if you're taking small steps and you're not making progress quickly, 'Rome wasn't built in a day.'

Prioritise your activities

Take care of your physical, mental and emotional wellbeing as you work towards any change. Prioritise activities that recharge and rejuvenate you, such as meditation, exercise, hobbies, or spending time with loved ones.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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