When it comes to responsibility, we can apportion our baggage and discontentment to the events of our past where family is concerned, but that doesn’t help, because we still have to function in the present. Instead, we must take responsibility for ourselves.

By the time we’re adults, we’ve already stacked up a list of issues assigning blame, but not taking responsibility for dealing with our issues and trying to move forward with our lives. Growing up I was always a people pleaser, now I believe we must take responsibility and do what’s right for us, regardless of what’s gone before us.

When it comes to family, resentments and injustices will always surface, it's the nature of family, the consequences of which may mean you will drift apart. If that is the case, it is always best to try to sort out any differences.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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6 comments on “Taking responsibility”

  1. I agree. As adults we can sort things out better than when we were younger. Making the right choices are so much better for us in the long run. We need to learn how to forgive others and know that no one is perfect.

    In the end we will all sleep better at night because we'll have a clearer conscience. If others don't get it, just know we tried and it's not our fault. Very thought provoking post Ilana. Thank you for everything!

    1. I agree that as adults we can sort things out better than when we're children, but patterns form and they're very hard to shift. One of the reasons why many adults don't go on to change their lives, they just live with them. I believe it can be done.

      Thanks for your support Lisa. You're a gem!

  2. I really like today's topic. It is the catalyst that transformed my life into true maturity. I had so many memories of the dysfunctional behavior I grew up with in my family, however these thoughts and sometimes convoluted memories had been cemented in my mind while thinking as a child.

    As any child I was the center of my universe and therefore thought every ones behavior was directed at me choreographed with me as the centerpiece. This left me blaming everyone else for my emotional stability.

    This kind of immaturity led to a miserable life until I finally figured life out and started to take responsibility for my own life. It took me finally seeing my mistakes and realizing that we are all just human beings and subject to our own shortcomings.

    Today I live a life of self reflection and living for today being the best Brian possible.

    1. Brian I am so proud and pleased to know you. Your positive attitude to your life and what you have dealt with, with your family being dysfunctional is an inspiration. Nice to see that you work on being the best that you can be.

  3. I completely agree in that one's path in life is never set in stone. It's possible to change but you have to want it bad enough and be dedicated to the cause in order for that work. Nobody ever said getting what you want or what you think is best/right was easy but it is attainable overtime.

    1. For some people this works LeAnna, but unfortunately others don't manage to change their path in life, however hard they try.

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