The definition of ‘wilful’ is intentional, and reflects a ‘couldn’t care less attitude’. When parents do something that is wilful, they consciously make a decision. That isn't the same thing as unconsciously struggling to parent your child.
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (‘CBT’) helps me to see and understand more of my experiences so that I’m looking at the bigger picture, a different angle on the angle I have. What is incredulous is that others may live their lives around us, without so much of a conscience.
Freewill
Since everything we do is down to freewill, freewill is what you have. We consciously make our choices. But like we have freewill to make our choices, we also have freewill to unmake those choices. We have freewill to choose to support others, in the same way we have freewill not to.
Conclusion
It's hard for anyone to know that what they had to deal with is trauma. That those close to us may wittingly fail to address our needs, like those needs didn’t matter, like we didn’t matter.
For me, my neurological issues make up the biggest part of my disability and that is what I struggled with the most. What I am irked at is the quality of life I could have had, if I'd had the support for my mental and emotional struggles.
No child should be the subject of wilful neglect as opposed though an unfortunate set of circumstances beyond a parent's control, such as poverty.
There is simply no excuse and to impose that on a child is wrong. As you say, none of this is on you, it will always be on those who inflicted this on you.
You were a child!
Thanks. As you say none of this is on me and I agree. But when that guilt has nowhere to go it is easy to think you need to carry it. I know better than to do that.
My blog has been instrumental in helping me to come to terms with my past. But those instrumental need to accept their parts and own it for themselves.