Channel 4’s ‘altogether different’ – You’re different. We’re different. #Altogether Different slogan had me in mind. (Source: https://www.channel4.com)

Failing to 'work with difference'

Where we struggle to find our voice in an able world, others fail to work with us. They know they should, but may fall short of tolerating and working with people with difference, in a way that fits the disability brief.

On Red Table Talk, Oscar Award winner Sandra Bullock talks about racism. “Your Sickness is Not My Problem.” - Sandra Bullock. After adopting two Black children, she opens up about the racism and judgment she’s experienced. (Source: https://www.facebook.com)

Difference is open to conflict

Any difference can be open to conflict, although that can be put down to the nature of what ‘difference’ is. On our part, we hope others will be open and receptive to accepting we are mentally and emotionally different.

Difference doesn’t come without its challenges. It’s not always obvious when you meet someone, they have mental and emotional challenges. For some, when our interpretation of the world doesn’t fall into line with their expectations, they may fall short to help us, for others it’s knowing they are working with someone with difference and they’re still indifferent.

'Work with Difference'

But it is important the world works with difference and to just be okay with it. We think differently, but we shouldn’t be penalised for thinking and presenting differently. Instead, there needs to be tolerance, patience and understanding.

March is Cerebral Palsy Month

The month of March is Cerebral Palsy month. A month in which those with cerebral palsy put out facts and figures to quash any stigmatisation around a disability they live with, and that is difficult. I have cerebral palsy.

Cerebral Palsy is a physical, mental, and emotional disability that affects people in their everyday. Although I have written about my disability widely on my blog and how I present, I choose not to call those others out, because it’s up to them to take stock of how they behave. But my case isn't unique by any stretch.

Although we live with a stigma, it's for others to make their own moral judgment call on how they deal with us. The world needs to change its attitude and change tack also. But it’s not just stigma and disability, you have race and gender too, who also get a bad press, because they are different.

We are 'all' uniquely different

The irony is that we’re all ‘uniquely different’ therefore there just needs to be acceptance. We need to make ourselves and the world in which we live, better. I don't just have cerebral palsy, I have autism and how autism affects each of us is limitless. The same is true for mental health, no two cases are the same and both are extensive.

In 2022, it is important to acknowledge all types of difference and diversity; to acknowledge how all types of diversity impacts a person’s identity, particularly around mental health and their experiences of mental health.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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2 comments on “Working with Difference”

  1. Thank you for writing about this. Yes, we are all different but that should help us make a difference. All difference should be welcomed, embraced and supported, instead of punishing people for them.

    No one should be made to feel they are being treated differently and yet it happens everyday day of every week. Is it really so hard hard to treat each other with respect, compassion and equality?

    You wouldn't have thought so and yet we aren't even close to making inroads into our centuries old prejudices.

  2. “Your Sickness is Not My Problem.” – Sandra Bullock.

    Sandra Bullock's statement says it all. It is important to do more to work with people with difference. Not only is it the right thing to do, but no one ever knows when they may need help back.

    As you ask your question: 'is it really so hard to treat each other with respect, compassion and equality?' - no, it's not hard, and it needs to happen if we are going to better ourselves and our relationships.

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