"Do they understand how much I love them?" Paddy McGuiness talking about his children's autistic diagnosis.

I’m loving the fact that being in the public, he’s able to talk about it. I’m not so lucky that way. I have a blog where I can talk about my life with autism, but that's where our similarities end.

My autistic diagnosis

Getting my autistic diagnosis at the age of 56 has been life affirming, life changing because it has opened me up to a world beyond a diagnosis, a name. It also meant for the first time I could come to terms with ‘how I was’ and stop blaming myself for years of being misunderstood and being blamed for just being ‘me.’

Finding out about my diagnosis has given me a life. Yes, I say given, because for the first time I am able to place each experience. My difficulties have been the continual misunderstandings and miscommunications, because I was dealing with autism and because I presented differently. It's no excuse.

Managing autism 

Dealing with autism is a constant. The issue for us is we're not able to feel, interpret and understand our emotions, or understand how our feelings work. We can say we love someone or something, but autism doesn't allow for feeling. Being autistic means we can't feel and know that. We don't understand feelings.

Autism is a neurological condition

Autism is a neurological condition that presents differently for each of us. Where we struggle to show, understand, or feel love, autism doesn’t change who we are, but it can change other people's perceptions of us. With autism, there is no 'us' getting better as the years go by.

For me it is important I am not to be trapped by the fear and anxiety I live with, because I have and deal with autism. On a general note, it is important not to care what others think, but what is important is what you think.