Another dip

Date 23 July 2012
Author Ilana Estelle
With so much stress going on in my life, I’m feeling a little despondent again today. When I’m having a bad day, my thoughts and my writing take a knock. I’ve lost all concentration. I need some quiet time and rest to evaluate things. The good news is I'm still…
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Thoughts on passing

Date 22 July 2012
Author Ilana Estelle
We may hold on to our most inner thoughts at the thought of losing someone we love. Growing up my parents seemed to be immortal. When my mother passed, I couldn’t imagine her not being in my life. As a child, I wasn’t encouraged to explore the possibilities that I…
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The CP Diary blogs

Date 19 July 2012
Author Ilana Estelle
The ideas for my personal blogs are based on my own personal thoughts. They are my thoughts on life, my experiences, based on universal understanding and make up what you read in my blogs. It is because I have Cerebral Palsy that certain of my senses are heightened. For as…
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Unintentional hurt

Date 18 July 2012
Author Ilana Estelle
The most common problem in a relationship is being emotionally wounded by those who hurt us by their comments that may sometimes seem intentional. Some relationships, when complacency sets in, harbours unintentional hurt, such as bringing up issues from the past that aren’t ...
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This morning's thoughts

Date 16 July 2012
Author Ilana Estelle
I’ve woken up with so many thoughts this morning, probably brought about through hospital visits this weekend. I’m tired of feeling tired, because I’m working through hoops trying to straighten my life out in one way or another. Although things seem brighter, I’m still working through my father’s health. I…
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People pleasers

Date 15 July 2012
Author Ilana Estelle
As people pleasers, our appearance to those who know us will be seen as considerate and courteous. We may act like a team player, someone who is supportive and helpful in times of need. We’re usually happy to go along with other people’s request, partly because we care and partly…
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Changing negative thoughts

Date 11 July 2012
Author Ilana Estelle
It’s no secret that as a child my inner thoughts were negative. Knowing what I know about my neurological impairments, those negative thoughts were unlikely to change, therefore I continually had to find ways through. My suggestions for changing negative thoughts are: Try and replace one negative thought you have…
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More of the same

Date 8 July 2012
Author Ilana Estelle
The house is quiet and I have more time to chill today. I love having and being in my own space. Although some things are working out, other things aren’t. My father is back on chemotherapy when he should be taking a break, so that’s more stress for me to…
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Dealing with brain fog

Date 6 July 2012
Author Ilana Estelle
I usually stagnate when problems don’t shift, change or move on. As long as others are straight with me I can deal with anything. My mind tends to go into confusion when I’m not able to connect with words and my intuition hasn’t kicked in. Brain fog can ...
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Why things happen

Date 5 July 2012
Author Ilana Estelle
I believe things happen for a reason that there is something of value that comes out of every situation as long as we look for the understanding and the lessons. We always have valuable lessons to learn. Sometimes opportunities come out of difficult situations. When I can equate and understand…
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Living with no regrets

Date 4 July 2012
Author Ilana Estelle
For many years, I lived with guilt and constant regrets that left me agitated, stressed and angry. Each day felt like a new battle. Every way I turned, my disappointments and failings continued to stare back at me. I couldn’t get rid of the guilt, particularly with school. It was…
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Being labelled

Date 2 July 2012
Author Ilana Estelle
When I found out at 46 that I had Cerebral Palsy I had no idea what I had been dealing with, but it didn’t stop me being labelled and misunderstood. People would talk about me and stare at me as if I wasn’t there. Comfortable 'being me' If it was…
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