Accepting change

Date 16 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
In life things are inevitable, so are the problems we face. But each day is a step nearer to a resolve, whatever that resolve turns out to be. I also believe our emotional problems outweigh our physical ones and that if we dealt with our emotions, we’d find a resolve…
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Working things out

Date 15 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
This morning I woke up and couldn’t focus on anything, but things have slowly got better. It’s always so hard to focus on anything other than what we’re dealing with, but I’m hopeful we’ll find clarity eventually. My mind seems so confused as to how we got to this place,…
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Where we're at now

Date 13 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
A lot has happened in the last week and a half and I’m now working on getting clarity back in my life. In life we don’t always know if decisions we make that seem right at the time, will work out the way we hope and as a  result we’re…
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A reflection on my week

Date 10 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
The last two journals have been poignant for me. They’ve also brought back many thoughts of what I get to deal with. I cannot believe what a difference a week makes. My life a week ago seemed easier. We’ve all been working through new experiences. All the things I’ve been…
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Coping with chaos

Date 9 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
It is often the case that when our life is thrown into chaos, we find ways to mentally work through it. Feelings associated with chaos, such as stress and anxiety, will begin to dissipate as we become more skillful at handling our emotions. Once we stand back, assess and observe…
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A sense of change

Date 8 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
I believe it’s true that we go through life more or less knowing what to expect and with any small changes that come along, we’re usually equipped to cope. Because any small changes are not so different from the norm, they continue to have an overall sense of familiarity about…
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Another doctor's appointment

Date 3 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
Having been to my doctors today, I set to working on the information I was given for another possible lead so that another Consultant can help me with my Cerebral Palsy. Having now made a few phone calls, the name of the consultant I was given this morning hasn’t worked…
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More thoughts on my CP

Date 2 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
I sometimes think that living with cerebral palsy is like living behind a mask. Only someone with cerebral palsy will understand what that means. It is difficult for me to work through each day, without feeling as though everything is a chore. I find it difficult to be present in…
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Accepting responsibility

Date 1 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
How many of us use blame to excuse the way we behave? Blame is like anger. It allows a person to behave or act in a way that can be damaging and isn’t appropriate. We tend to develop a thought pattern that sends our emotions into overdrive, we lose self-control,…
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Why we should remain upbeat

Date 30 August 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
Even from a small age, I always tried to remain upbeat no matter what I was dealing with, but remaining upbeat hasn’t always been easy for me. Part of the problem is that we come to accept where we are and see where we are as a fait accompli and that’s…
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The true meaning of friendships

Date 29 August 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
It’s easy to feel that we know someone well, but the little bits that make up some of the bigger bits we know about them, isn’t the same as knowing or having a soul connection. We can know someone for twenty years and still not know anything about that person,…
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Having the last word

Date 27 August 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
How many of us know someone who, no matter what, needs to have the last word? Having the last word is a habit: it’s an environmental and cultural problem that comes from stubbornness or background. When it comes to family, we probably already know who must have the last word.…
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