Finding closure again

Date 23 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
Having already seen one neurologist when I was first diagnosed with cerebral palsy, two years later I opted to see another neurologist, so I could try to find out a little more about my symptoms and although the consultation wasn’t altogether a success, I came away with more positive thoughts.…
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Making good choices

Date 22 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
I was never allowed to make any of my own choices or decisions growing up, so I’ve had to learn as the adult how to do those. Making any kind of choice or decision takes confidence and the mental ability for us to work through the consequences on some of…
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You're on your own

Date 21 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
I remember my father once telling me when he was ill that it doesn’t matter what you deal with, you’re on your own. Whether you’re dealing with a redundancy; a broken leg; or something else that changes the way we get to deal with life, ultimately you’re dealing with it…
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Trying to move forward

Date 19 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
We’re still working through the enormity of everything we’ve been dealing with, as far as surgery is concerned. Although we still have to wait for the swelling to go down on Daniel’s nose, he wants to go for a second opinion to make sure his nose is as it should…
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Working at lifestyle choices

Date 18 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
I write a lot about things that contribute to my wellbeing, because I need to be ready to cope with my disability and whatever life throws at me. Although our lifestyles contribute to our wellbeing, they can also make us ill. The following suggestions may help: Objectively identify the areas…
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Accepting change

Date 16 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
In life things are inevitable, so are the problems we face. But each day is a step nearer to a resolve, whatever that resolve turns out to be. I also believe our emotional problems outweigh our physical ones and that if we dealt with our emotions, we’d find a resolve…
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Working things out

Date 15 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
This morning I woke up and couldn’t focus on anything, but things have slowly got better. It’s always so hard to focus on anything other than what we’re dealing with, but I’m hopeful we’ll find clarity eventually. My mind seems so confused as to how we got to this place,…
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Where we're at now

Date 13 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
A lot has happened in the last week and a half and I’m now working on getting clarity back in my life. In life we don’t always know if decisions we make that seem right at the time, will work out the way we hope and as a  result we’re…
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A reflection on my week

Date 10 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
The last two journals have been poignant for me. They’ve also brought back many thoughts of what I get to deal with. I cannot believe what a difference a week makes. My life a week ago seemed easier. We’ve all been working through new experiences. All the things I’ve been…
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Coping with chaos

Date 9 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
It is often the case that when our life is thrown into chaos, we find ways to mentally work through it. Feelings associated with chaos, such as stress and anxiety, will begin to dissipate as we become more skillful at handling our emotions. Once we stand back, assess and observe…
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A sense of change

Date 8 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
I believe it’s true that we go through life more or less knowing what to expect and with any small changes that come along, we’re usually equipped to cope. Because any small changes are not so different from the norm, they continue to have an overall sense of familiarity about…
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Another doctor's appointment

Date 3 September 2011
Author Ilana Estelle
Having been to my doctors today, I set to working on the information I was given for another possible lead so that another Consultant can help me with my Cerebral Palsy. Having now made a few phone calls, the name of the consultant I was given this morning hasn’t worked…
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