A special needs child

Date 9 December 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
Having empathy helps us understand how a child with special needs works, but me having special needs was never something I equated in myself, because that part of my life was never afforded to me. And although any parent dealing with a child who has special needs finds dealing with…
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A page from someone's book

Date 6 December 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
I can see how without actively thinking about our lives, we may end up copying the very people we should actively be seeking to distance ourselves from. Personally, I’ve never understood those who choose to copy others, particularly when those they’re copying are less than squeaky clean. Perhaps we must…
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Being critical

Date 5 December 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
I’ve heard it said, ‘don’t criticise what you don’t understand.’ Instead, we may come in from a place of knowing, when in reality we may know very little. We fall into a pattern where we have an opinion, we criticise, we assume, and we think we know. We become less…
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Bumps in the road

Date 2 December 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
While our life is made up of setbacks and bumps in the road, they’re ones we’d rather not repeat, but may go on to repeat. It is the decisions that are made for us that act as setbacks, unless our decisions are the ones we make for ourselves. It’s other…
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Recognising others' issues

Date 28 November 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
It is far easier to know how to help others, than it is to help ourselves. Perhaps it’s got something to do with the fact that other people’s problems aren’t our problems. That said, some of us are good at sorting our own issues out and tend not to over-complicate…
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Angry people hurt people

Date 24 November 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
Angry people hurt people. It takes strength and courage from us to take a step back and remind ourselves that being angry, or hurt because we are hurt, doesn’t mean we have to hurt others. Whether we’re on the receiving end, or we’re handing out the hurt, all our reactions…
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Unlocking our thinking

Date 21 November 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
We will either spend a life disengaging, then engaging, reacting inappropriately, get that wrong, then disengage again. Unproductive actions lead us to nowhere, instead of us using our time productively to unlock our thinking, engage our thoughts, then create conversations that allow us to think about present or future possibilities…
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Silencing our inner critic

Date 20 November 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
Having positive role models when we’re children is the key to an unwanted inner critic, but in times of continual stress and negativity, sadly it’s easy to see why we have it. The first step of us being able to handle our inner critic is to become aware of our…
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Questions and Clarification

Date 16 November 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
Asking questions gives us clarity. It’s the simplest way of learning and its effective too. It’s also the best way for us to gain deeper insight. Questions inform, inspire, they encourage healthy debate and discussion. But questions may not always go down well either. It depends who is answering your…
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Mirroring relationships

Date 13 November 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
A friend of mine brought up a valid comment in one of his responses to my blog and wanted to write further about it. ‘It doesn’t make sense for someone to suffer in front of me, when I should mirror what that person feels, especially if we’re in a relationship…
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Self-worth and others

Date 11 November 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
Although some of us may have emotional wounds inflicted upon us by others and as a result, a lack of self-worth is what we end up having to deal with, we owe it to ourselves to make sure we work on our self-worth and healing ourselves. Emotional wounds mean bouts…
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The Undateables

Date 8 November 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
There is a TV programme in the UK called ‘The Undateables,’ which is centred around those people who are mentally and physical disabled, who get to go out on dates like the rest of us and they're then renamed 'The Dateables.' I just love the sentiment behind the programme. I…
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