Staying true to myself – this is a difficult blog to write.
Watching the film Some Like It Hot.
Where Tony Curtis says he can't feel anything.
For him it’s an act.
For me, it’s real.
Cerebral palsy is usually seen in the body.
What people don’t see is how it can affect feelings.
Emotional processing sits where the injury sits.
For me that means feelings are muted, absent.
I can look distant, vacant.
That distance isn’t a choice.
It’s my brain.
There’s the inner experience.
There’s the outer read.
They don’t always match.
Understanding the neurology helps.
It removes blame – helps others to understand – and to put my disability into context.
Cerebral palsy is the injury – autism is the clinical language that describes how my emotional processing is affected.
Support can improve function – it doesn’t alter the underlying neurology.
Writing and Therapy help me to manage how I function.
It doesn’t fix difference – it frames it.
I’m not pretending to be detached.
I’m living how my brain works.
It isn’t always easy.
But it’s honest – running The CP Diary blog
