As a child growing up with something, later finding out it was cerebral palsy, meant my disability would become part of my family’s life too. Trying to manage any disability around family is difficult.

I didn’t know what was wrong with me, let alone how what was wrong with me would affect us all, but years later and a comment that was made by one of my siblings, reinforced those thoughts.

From a parents point of view, it is difficult to know what’s best or how to deal with raising a child with a physical or mental disability, without ignoring their other children. However hard a parent tries, their attention will always turn to the child that struggles. It’s the nature of raising a child with a disability.

All my hospital, exercise and physiotherapy appointments were met, but all my other issues were overlooked. My neurological problems were never aired or discussed. With the help of outside intervention, it is important for parents to be open and honest about what the family deal with, because they look after a child or a sibling with a disability.

It is also important parents explain to their other children in a language their children will understand, why their sister or brother needs the extra help. When nothing is discussed and the parents’ attention turns to the child that needs the most help, it is inevitable their other children will struggle too.

As a general rule, children are happy to go with something once they’ve had things explained to them. I am sure any child would be happy to help their brother or sister, if it meant they got the help they needed, because they deal with a disability.

In families, problems arise when attention is given to the child with the disability, and his or her siblings are continually being left out, and ignored.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

Most people who read this blog

went on to read these blogs next
Date 26 July 2026
Author Ilana Estelle

Living with Difference

Seen, Misjudged, Rarely Understood For most of my life, I lived in the dark. Not because I didn't know I was different, but because I didn't yet have the understanding to explain why life always felt harder than it seemed to be ...
Read more
Date 24 July 2026
Author Ilana Estelle

The Hidden Effects of Loss

Some consequences aren't immediate, they're cumulative It's five months into four years through twin loss, and I've split another tooth. On its own, it's an ordinary event. But it's an event that made me stop and look back ...
Read more
Date 19 July 2026
Author Ilana Estelle

What Writing Taught Me About Self-Understanding

How writing became more than a creative outlet When I started writing, I had no idea where it would lead. I simply needed somewhere to put my thoughts – a place to make sense of experiences I struggled to understand ...
Read more
1 2 3 681

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Subscribe to receive regular updates

Enter your details below to be the first to receive updates on new articles on my blog.