A few days into 2023, and I’m struggling to comprehend what has happened and where my personal life has taken me. I could never have envisaged a life without my twin.
I’m not sure how she views her life in spirit, but the split is difficult. I’ve not known my life without being a twin. I’ve never lived a single life.
Leaving my home to head to London for Christmas 2022 was enormously difficult. It didn't feel right. Throughout the journey I was teary. I wasn’t ready, it felt forced and scary. Now for the first time I feel as though I am on my own. Having read other people’s twin stories on social media, my twin-loss is very much the pattern.
In 2023 as I begin my journey as a twinless twin, the twin link is there. The good and bad experiences we shared, remain a focus. It’s a link that isn’t easily severed.
All I can do is continue to work on my mental health, in the hope that I can begin to feel better. It’s not something that just corrects itself, but it’s something I need to continue to work on.
For more inspirational, life-changing blogs, please check out my site https://www.thecpdiary.com.
I imagine there is a unique grief that comes with the death of a twin. When one twin dies, a profound sense of loss remains with the surviving twin, leaving them forever a twinless twin.
Unfortunately this can be overlooked and people don't understand the bereavement process for twins, is different from mourning another sibling, or close family member.
It's early days and I imagine those feelings are very raw for you. In time, I am sure you will find a place for your loss. The hurt will always be there but somehow you will manage the pain better.
I have read the same thing and agree. Currently just putting one foot in front of the other can be difficult.
I know I'd be worse without my writing. I'm not rushing, however long it takes. I hope my feelings will be reciprocated.
I feel your pain, it breaks my heart.
But I believe your twin is with you, breathing in spirit, giving you comfort when you need it the most.
We, The CP Diary community, are wrapping our arms around you, Ilana.
Thanks Tim. That's kind. Even through 'spiritual' living, the spirit world isn't something we can know about for sure.
But through my spiritual beliefs I have a basic understanding of how the spirit world works. I would like to think my twin will be tucked away in spirit, working on her own life with a little more ease, more than she managed here.
The spirit world allows for us to become better versions of ourselves from how we lived our life earth side, from what I have personally been told through readings.
It can take time for loved ones to connect, due to the nature of their passing and the work they need to do on themselves, once they reach spirit. In some cases, loved ones may choose not to connect, once they have gone through their own healing.