Having lost my twin in December 2022, I am still not only struggling to come to terms with her passing, but also struggling to work through and come to terms with Eagle Syndrome. Without my twin, the nights are the worst. We're apart but I don’t feel separate. It’s the first time in 59 years my twin and I have been separated. We had separate lives, but she was always in the background.

Without my twin and with Eagle Syndrome

Now without my twin and with Eagle Syndrome, I need to be better at understanding my triggers around the condition.

My twin would know just what to do and if she didn't she'd find you a solution. The condition although it’s not Trigeminal Neuralgia still has similarities, in terms of pain. I still deal with neuralgia, tooth and jaw pain and earache.

Having Eagle Syndrome thing is not the life I imagined I’d be living after losing my twin. For my twin now in spirit, healing can be easily achieved. She struggled mentally this side of life, she's isn't struggling now. I need to feel better, to continue to write, but she'll always be with me.

Being alone without her while trying to navigate the pandemic, is my struggle. Have you lost someone close and how do you cope?

For Sheila.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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