I have so many thoughts tonight. I feel indifferent, calm and very tired. We may come to reflect on our relationships around the time we know someone we love is terminally ill. Relationships are about expression, we need to be able to express ourselves.
Picking fault is unhelpful and counterproductive
It would be easy for us to look back and pick fault, or feel guilty about something we've said, but I feel it's unhelpful and counterproductive. It's perfectly acceptable to react to something that we're not happy with. It doesn't change, just because someone is terminally ill.
Taking responsibility for our choices
On our part, we may be made to feel guilty, but others need to understand our behaviour is because they didn't give us a choice. If we had been given a choice the situation would never have arisen, and we wouldn’t feel guilty. It is important to take responsibility.
We can always do things better
As we may go about our lives, we may not always stop to think about how we behave or what we say to people. It is only when we look back that we may see that we could have done things better.
The next time you feel guilty, think about whether you are responsible. Remember it takes two to work a relationship. A terminal illness doesn't change that.
I agree with you. I think we feel guilty too much. It does take two and it should take two to resolve things.
Yes Lisa I think you're right. It's a shame many of us don't manage to do that.
We tend to carry the guilt with us once our loved ones have gone.
I agree guilt has much to answer for, whereas we should just be answerable to ourselves.
I totally agree with your sentiments.
We should be just answerable to ourselves without feeling guilty for something that's said that we had no choice but to act on.