For the first time in a long time, I really feel out of my depth. As I’m still trying to find calm in my life, our family experiences in the last 6 years are still here, coupled with more stress that we've had to deal with in the last few days.

It’s really not surprising that I feel out of my depth. It's school again, and we've also had four months of revision to deal with and with two more weeks of exams, the pressure is still very much on.

I'm in the process of organising an overnight break at the end of June. We all very much need a break and soon. I hope my health holds out for it.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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4 comments on “Out of my depth”

  1. I think you are handling things very well even though you're having bad days. It will soon be over and you can get on. A break sounds wonderful! I think everybody deserves a break every now and then (some more than others).

    I don't see a break for us anytime soon. The most I can hope for is to get some nursing in here to help with my son so that I can get back to being a nurse occasionally.

    I am having lunch with a friend this week so that will be a short break for me. I haven't gotten out in a long time and taking care of my son with minimal help from anyone else is taking it's toll; but I wouldn't change it for anything.

    I hope your family gets better soon so you can get the normalcy you so much deserve.

    1. Thanks Lisa. Yes it sounds as though you could do with a break too. Hope that comes soon for you in the shape of extra help for your son.

      From what you say though, it sounds as though you're coping admirably.

  2. Please don't stretch yourself to the limit. It sounds like you're doing too much at one time. Measure your steps and try not to ask too much of yourself too soon.

    You'll find that area of calm, It just takes a little more time. Six months is not much time for recovery. It took me six years.

    1. Thanks Tim. I've obviously worded the title badly! I am honestly working at the same pace I usually work at, although it's that time of year again and I'm dealing with CP issues.

      The summer months tend to make how I feel worse.

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