As a follow on from my 'Rules of the Road' blog, below are some more of my rules of the road. The following allows us to get past the point of no return, and allows us to take control.

  • Always clear the air so that disagreements don’t stay disagreements for long;
  • Accept that you’re wrong when you are wrong;
  • Try not to finish a conversation on a bad note and if you can’t agree, try to look for a compromise.

It is important to open our mind to what is being said, to stop reading between the lines and avoid hearing what you want, rather than what you may need to hear.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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8 comments on “Rules of the Road/2”

  1. Great rules to follow. I do try to do all of these. My conscience would bother me no end if I left things on a bad note and I would have to go back and apoligise even if I'm right. I've always been this way.

    I can remember a particular time in high school. I did get with this other girl's boyfriend but I believe looking back on it, it was date rape. He got me high some how and things happened that I would never do. She found out and an argument pursued between us.

    I had been friends with this girl for a while so I felt very guilty about the argument and I apoligised for the argument. I didn't want it to continue.

    I hated the thought of someone being mad at me. I didn't apologise for the other because I really didn't think it was my fault, but if she had continued to be upset with me I would have; just to make amends.

    Reply

    1. Thanks Lisa. I think we can all compromise or reach an understanding which wasn't there before, as long as we all work on it.

      It has to happen. Unfortunately it doesn't always happen, which is why we end up walking away, or holding a grudge. Whether we're right or wrong we should follow these rules.

      As parents it's important we mediate.

      Reply

  4. There is a difference between active listening and actually ascertaining what you are listening to. Often times reading between the lines will only give us a false reading of a situation.

    I have no problem correcting myself or apologizing if I don't follow the rules of the road.

    Reply

    1. Thanks Tim. Yes there is a difference. Reading between the lines is a hard one and all depends on whether you're reading between the lines correctly.

      Reading between the lines is helpful, particularly if we're trying to ascertain what someone is telling us and they're not explaining it very well. It is important we understand the bigger picture.

      As you say, it can also give us a false reading of a situation when we misread the situation and get the wrong end of the stick.

      Reply

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