When we take the time to understand a person's motives and intentions, it becomes easier to make sense of their actions. Reading between the lines and reflecting on our experiences can bring clarity and deeper understanding.
Through reflection, I was able to see and make sense of what happened to me. Understanding another person's reasoning doesn’t always justify their actions, but it can help us process our experiences with greater ease. What I went through pushed me forward, driven by my determination to understand. However, it’s important to recognise that not everyone’s decisions are made with the intentions we assume.
Acknowledging someone's actions doesn’t also mean excusing them. I chose not to simply accept what happened to me as just another experience – some things should be acknowledged for what they are.
People usually choose the softer, easier way which is the decision my parents often made. My mother would keep complaining about one issue or another and my dad would do dog tricks trying to make her happy.
The biggest problem with that decision, was they seemed to forget that they had 4 kids; they didn't stop and think how it would affect us. They chose to ignore the herd of elephants in the living-room while we were the ones getting trampled in the stampede.
Looking back, it's pretty easy to see why things happened the way that they did, even though most of the time what they did didn't make a lot of sense.
My dad did everything he could to make my mother happy, but nothing ever seemed to work, so we were in trouble from the start.
Thanks Randy. Yes, a dysfunctional relationship will always be dysfunctional until one or both people change it. Although no one goes to school to be a parent, it's important parents at least try to fathom things out and put their children first.
Your experiences and mine also show how that didn't happen. Where we could do the same thing with our own children, it's important we work to change that. Each of us have a responsibility and will leave a legacy behind. I believe it's important we leave the right legacy.
All children want to know is that their parents at least tried, even if they don't achieve everything.