Abandonment is often described as "the state of being left helpless and without protection." It's a journey often marked by confusion and isolation. The experience of abandonment isn’t unique – it can touch anyone, in any situation, and at any time – leaving that person to face challenges through being ignored and having to confront their challenges on their own.

Whether it stems from emotional or mental neglect, physical absence or societal indifference, abandonment weaves a common thread of vulnerability. It’s a harsh reality for me, and for many, one that forces individuals to grapple with challenges they may not always be prepared to handle. This was especially true for me, as a vulnerable child with special needs.

Abandonment is 'profound'

Abandonment can be a deeply personal, profound and often painful experience that leaves lasting emotional scars. Abandonment can bring about a profound sense of worthlessness and loss. It takes many forms, from emotional withdrawal to physical absence, leaving that person feeling isolated. It can take years to heal, it is important to look for the understanding.

Abandonment and Emotional Distance

Emotional distance can often be just as devastating as a physical departure, as it erodes trust, leaving those abandoned to question why. Abandonment has nothing to do with the person experiencing abandonment.

Its effects are 'long-lasting'

The effects of abandonment are long-lasting. Abandonment can carry feelings of fear, and anxiety – anxiety that if continued carry into future relationships. It's often difficult to shake off. Abandonment can also be a struggle, a struggle to trust others. It may also leave those abandoned to seek false validation to avoid the pain.

Conclusion

Ultimately, abandonment if allowed to continue over the years, shapes a person's identity, influencing how they view themselves and the world around them, often leaving behind emotional scars that can take time to heal. It is important to continue to keep working on yourself.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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