Taking an emotional rest

Date 17 February 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
I’ve decided to take an emotional rest day today. I’m not thinking about anything in particular and need to just let things be. I feel okay with everything so far. If I did open my mind to think about things, I wish I had some form of closure on the stress…
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A new thought process

Date 15 February 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
I am beginning to reflect a little. I know I still need to bring closure on how I got to my cerebral palsy diagnosis. Given the fact that I will soon be no longer in a position to address this with my father, the time has come when I need…
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Hard to like

Date 14 February 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
We’ve probably all come across people where something we say that seems totally innate, will turn into a massive argument with us feeling more frustrated that we’re having to fight our corner and still we can’t agree on things. I know I have. When discussions turn When a discussion turns,…
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Negotiating stress

Date 13 February 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
I want a life that’s quiet, one that doesn’t involve having to compromise my thoughts, feelings and beliefs and where I don’t have to avoid stress for fear of becoming unwell. The problem is that if we have years of negative history with certain people and that continues, we’re likely…
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Changing circumstances

Date 11 February 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
I’ve always had something to deal with, so my circumstances changing again shortly, will be nothing new to me. The thought that one day I will lose another parent, isn’t scaring me. My father will be where he wants to be and that’s okay. Throughout this process I’ve always thought…
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Things will be easier

Date 10 February 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
I managed to sort out the problem I had yesterday and feel so much better about it. I just hate that feeling of not being in control, but I know that once things come to a head with my father, we’ll all be more at ease with everything; including dealing…
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Wrong decisions

Date 9 February 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
If someone asked my opinion about making big decisions, my advice would be to steer clear of the bigger decisions whilst you’re dealing with large amounts of stress. I’ve also been struggling with confidence issues. A decision you make that you seem happy with, then regret it once it’s made? …
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Pulling together

Date 8 February 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
It’s a challenge watching a family member work through a terminal illness, in some respects just waiting for the inevitable to happen. My spiritual beliefs mean I understand the process. Challenges are made easier when family members pull together. Whether we’re 40 or 70 years old, if you’ve always behaved…
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Someone else's life

Date 6 February 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
How many of us is our lifetime are continually conditioned to follow a certain path and live another person’s life? Whose life are we living and are our decisions based on what we want? Although I woke up in my thirties to the fact that someone else was controlling my…
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My thoughts in a quote

Date 3 February 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
It’s a good job our bad days aren’t usually repeated, because I wouldn’t want this day repeating for all the tea in china. I’ve had lots of feelings and thoughts today, but because I’ve had too many things on my mind, my thoughts have become jumbled. They have a habit…
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Parents making differences

Date 2 February 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
Any parent will be catapulted into a world of uncertainty as soon as they know they have a child who is born with physical, mental or emotional difficulties. Parents making a difference between siblings Over the years, my father spent a lot more time with me, driving me to my…
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An open mind

Date 31 January 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
We know what we know, we’re not interested because we know what we know, so why would we keep an open mind? Why an open mind is important? Having an open mind is important because it allows us to understand what’s going on in our reality, so that we can…
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