Silencing our inner critic

Date 20 November 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
Having positive role models when we’re children is the key to an unwanted inner critic, but in times of continual stress and negativity, sadly it’s easy to see why we have it. The first step of us being able to handle our inner critic is to become aware of our…
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Questions and Clarification

Date 16 November 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
Asking questions gives us clarity. It’s the simplest way of learning and its effective too. It’s also the best way for us to gain deeper insight. Questions inform, inspire, they encourage healthy debate and discussion. But questions may not always go down well either. It depends who is answering your…
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Mirroring relationships

Date 13 November 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
A friend of mine brought up a valid comment in one of his responses to my blog and wanted to write further about it. ‘It doesn’t make sense for someone to suffer in front of me, when I should mirror what that person feels, especially if we’re in a relationship…
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Self-worth and others

Date 11 November 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
Although some of us may have emotional wounds inflicted upon us by others and as a result, a lack of self-worth is what we end up having to deal with, we owe it to ourselves to make sure we work on our self-worth and healing ourselves. Emotional wounds mean bouts…
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The Undateables

Date 8 November 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
There is a TV programme in the UK called ‘The Undateables,’ which is centred around those people who are mentally and physical disabled, who get to go out on dates like the rest of us and they're then renamed 'The Dateables.' I just love the sentiment behind the programme. I…
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Happy when?

Date 7 November 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
‘I’ll be happy when…’ The biggest mistake we make is putting everything we want to do on hold, waiting for the time when we’re happy, when our life is problem free. In times of stress, we continue to justify our thinking around the usual stuff. For example things will change…
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In the driving seat

Date 4 November 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
It’s easy to think we have control, but then when we look at the bigger picture, we come to realise we have little control, or no control at all. It is often only when we look back that we see the pattern of decisions that have been made for us…
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Dealing with a cold

Date 1 November 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
Although we're at that time of year, colds can be prevalent any time of year. We know that a cold infects the upper respiratory tract and is caused by a virus. Colds are air born and can spread quickly through coughing and sneezing without protecting ourselves and being in contact…
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Being encouraged

Date 31 October 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
To encourage is to feel and be encouraged. For those who welcome being encouraged, the encouragement they receive will never go unnoticed, contrary to what that person feels. When we’re not feeling encouraged, it’s easy to lose sight of what others do. It is only when we look back that…
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Protecting our children

Date 27 October 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
As parents, it’s our job to protect our children and for the majority of us, we get that right. But where some parents serve to protect themselves out of selfishness, it is the children that become the victims. Sadly, the recent sad story about Sherin Mathews reinforces that view. Beautiful…
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Learning to identify

Date 23 October 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
We must allow ourselves to identify and make peace with ourselves, our past and with our present lives. By learning to identify with our experiences, deal with and come to terms with parts of those experiences that come from our past, we will begin to open our minds to life…
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Making assumptions

Date 20 October 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
It’s dangerous to assume or make assumptions about anyone. The fact that we take for granted or presuppose something about someone means we’ve already decided those things are true, before we have thought the situation through again. How do assumptions work? Assumptions are part of a belief system we believe…
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