I’ve had to be the protagonist of my own life, of my own 'story' around a physical, mental and emotional disability I didn't know about, because no one did it for me. I am not ashamed to say, I have struggled ever since I was a little girl.

Introspection brings clarity

As I continue to struggle, my blog continues to bring clarity. There is no doubt that using introspection has brought clarity. It has brought value and understanding to my life, allowing me to think about what I needed enough to go out and grasp it. Through my writing, I have that life.

Using introspection

Using introspection has allowed me to look at my experiences in the whole, for me to devise a plan, helping me work towards my goals, although in the early years not knowing I had a disability, I couldn't know what they were. Also, when your life has been marred by invalidation and dismissal, introspection certainly helps.

Seeking out truth

I know that being in control and being the main character of my ‘story’ has been rewarding. No matter our story, it is important to seek out our own truth, so that we become the architect of our life, not someone else and that is what I have done. Be the protagonist of your own stories.

A mindful state

I believe it contributes to a mindful state of being. It’s not about devaluing other people’s experiences, but if their recount of our experiences is different, that’s because what they're filtering is through their own prism, which is never ours.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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4 comments on “Protagonist of my own 'story'”

  1. If anyone is going to be the hero in our lives it ought to be us.

    You certainly nailed that and you also have the accolade through your blog, of being the hero of other people's lives too and that is pretty amazing.

    1. Thank you. Although I see it, I find it difficult to equate any of my achievements. It's not something I feel, although I know what people tell me.

      But no matter the 'story' or how we got to our story, or at what point we have control of our 'story,' it is important we are the architect to how we would like our 'story' to finish.

      I say finish as opposed to end, because the ending of anything seems final. What I think is we can change our lives to a certain degree. However we start, if we can find a way through it is always worth pursuing.

      Whilst we can't change others, whilst our story may have everything to do with others, blaming others and ignoring the fact that we still have to live our lives to the best of our ability doesn't help.

      I could have continued to ignore my disability, or I could choose to do something about it. I chose the latter and I couldn't be happier.

  2. It has only been in the last couple of years that I have tried to stay focused on my own story and my life has been so much better for it.

    I wasted most of my life doing what I thought other people wanted me to do but they really didn't care. I was brainwashed as a child to be a caretaker for my mother, so it's no wonder that I kept ending up in the same type of relationships.

    Now I'm working to accomplish what I really want. I'm not 100% sure of how much I can actually get done before the end, but it will be interesting to find out.

    1. Thanks Randy. I can't tell you how pleased I am to hear your life has been better for you since you started focusing on yourself.

      It also doesn't matter how long it takes us to get to that point, what matters is we start. I know your mother will know that none of what happened to you is your fault.

      I hope that you are able to use that information to continue to accomplish what you deserve to accomplish. No one really knows how much time they have here on planet earth.

      But what I am sure about is that we can change certain aspects of our life, just be changing the way we think about what happens to us.

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