Bringing understanding

Date 29 April 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
We can’t erase the memories, but through our understanding and finding a place for those memories, we free ourselves of the bitterness. The memories brought about through other people’s actions are then remembered as a valuable lesson. Letting go will never cancel out another person’s actions or the frustrations we…
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Look to change

Date 25 April 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
Throughout our lives, we may emotionally struggle. We’ve probably been insecure at one point, had low self-esteem, lacked a little confidence, but we should still want to put things right for others: the world needs more of it. When how we feel and cope begins to interfere with how we…
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Protect, not scar

Date 24 April 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
As parents, we must make ourselves aware of how we communicate with our children at every stage, because it is in the early years where emotional scarring begins. It is our job to protect, not scar our children. Some parents may have good intentions and set out to protect their…
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Using mediation

Date 21 April 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
Although mediation is involved and refers to an intervention in a dispute to resolve disputes, there is a different explanation that works in life too. Mediation is an intervention in a process or relationship and should work in families too. Not many families use mediation. They offer an opinion, the…
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Differing opinions

Date 19 April 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
Because we’re all a product of our own individual experiences and upbringing, it is only natural that our opinions will differ on a whole range of topics. The more our opinions differ, the less accepting we will be on other people’s opinions. There is a train of thought that the…
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New opportunities

Date 15 April 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
I’ve previously written a blog about the fact that our lives are mapped out from the minute we’re born. But even so, it’s important to understand that through our lives, we will come across opportunities that will be obvious to those of us who are adept at reading between the…
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Support & CP

Date 12 April 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
I have talked briefly in my ‘About Me’ page about the lack of support I received in my formative years around my physical difficulties, but had all the right support mechanisms been in place for me earlier, I am not sure I would have got to where I am now…
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Being unpredictable

Date 9 April 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
There are two types of thought on being unpredictable. The first one is accepted as part of life, the second is too scary to even think about. We can be unpredictable by going out of our way by doing something kind for someone and because that other someone isn't expecting…
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Others' perceptions

Date 8 April 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
Being a certain way means it’s easy for us others to tar us with their brush, if they’re that way inclined. It would be easier for them to pin the blame on us, even if we weren’t to blame. Why would that someone choose to see past how we are,…
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History repeating

Date 5 April 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
History has shown and continues to show how things could have been prevented. There have been many events like the tragic loss of life on board the Titanic and the atrocities of World War II, events that could possibly have been prevented and if not prevented, at least massively reduced.…
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Forced relationships

Date 1 April 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
Trying too hard to make any relationship work means the relationship is forced. Forced relationships can be uncomfortable and hard work and yet those are what many of us deal with. No relationship should ever be forced. Anything forced will never fit. I’m not sure we always consciously make the…
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When people reach out

Date 28 March 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
When anyone reaches out to us for help and we decide not to help them, we’ve already subconsciously decided they don’t need our help, that there’s clearly nothing wrong with them. People reach out because they need the help. Perhaps it’s us that need the help for us not wanting…
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