Memories still outstanding

Date 20 January 2018
Author Ilana Estelle
Although I have come to terms with most of my life there is one area of my life that I’m not quite settled with. We may think we know someone, but unless we get into their minds we can never really know someone. At the age of 25 and I…
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The CP Diary Newsletter

Date 15 January 2018
Author Ilana Estelle
I hope many of you as possible will subscribe to The CP Diary. When you subscribe you will receive a daily blog into your inbox. It’s just for blogs, and won’t include recipes or feature page quotes. Those of you who have already subscribed you should have received my first…
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Learning about me

Date 13 January 2018
Author Ilana Estelle
While parents may not always give their children the tools they need to be able to function in their lives, but for me I am irritated that I’m still having to work things out to learn about me. I’ve done it to understand my disability, understand me, something that wasn’t…
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My irrational fears

Date 9 January 2018
Author Ilana Estelle
Anyone who has Sensory Processing Disorder may potentially know they deal with irrational fears through anxiety and stress that can also leave them feeling panicked. I get to deal with all three. It’s very hard to explain to anyone who doesn’t understand what it is exactly that we have to…
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We can lament or move on

Date 7 January 2018
Author Ilana Estelle
We can cry about life, how things have worked out, where we are and what we’ve not achieved, or we can rationale and work on the changes we need to make. I chose to move forward. There is no point in lamenting over a life lost. No point in dwelling…
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Still exposed

Date 5 January 2018
Author Ilana Estelle
I’m never far away from the hardship of what has been life. Not knowing I had Cerebral Palsy, let alone dealing with its many symptoms, meant I was exposed. The more something is ignored and driven underground, the more that thing becomes exposed in other ways. My website allows me…
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Welcome to 2018

Date 1 January 2018
Author Ilana Estelle
Welcome to 2018. A time for reflection again. For those of us who have already made amends to continue in the New Year and for those of us who haven’t quite managed to start, to try to give things a go. Although the New Year can bring challenges, it can…
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Bringing 2017 to a close

Date 31 December 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
This year I chose to combine my reflections on 2017 with a Christmas blog, so there’s not much more left for me to say as 2017 draws to a close, suffice to say I wish you all a healthy and happy 2018. I would like to take this opportunity to…
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Keeping up the pretence

Date 27 December 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
My life was about having to keep up the pretence through a non-diagnosis and others still expecting me to conform as if nothing was wrong, without me being allowed to question my physical, mental and emotional issues. The irritating thing is that I never understood my issues, but conformed anyway,…
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Our all too familiar lives

Date 23 December 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
Being kept in the dark well into my forties continues to irritate me. Now finding out that I have 12 years of medical records missing is adding to that. It’s reinforcing what I’ve had to deal with and is having a bearing on how I feel. Add a disability and…
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A reflection, 2017

Date 22 December 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
It’s at this time of the year that I get to put my thoughts together. How I see the year and reflect. There is so much to think about when it comes to Christmas, the build-up can be incredibly stressful; particularly around its planning. I liken it to going on…
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The 'Spirit' of The CP Diary

Date 19 December 2017
Author Ilana Estelle
I started my blog 7 years ago to talk about a late Cerebral Palsy diagnosis, to be able to understand my life and my experiences. It was a first positive step for change. I wanted to find a place for my emotions coming into a late diagnosis. When people started…
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