Using My Blogs To Reflect

Date 5 September 2018
Author Ilana Estelle
I believe that although my more personal blogs outline issues that I’ve had to deal with over the years, or issues that I still have to deal with today, they serve a purpose for us all. My underlying messages My blogs carry an underlying message for us to think about,…
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More Pieces To The Jigsaw

Date 4 September 2018
Author Ilana Estelle
When it comes to us having and dealing with a disability, it’s important we choose to understand our symptoms and how we may present. Asperger’s fits my symptoms I am reading a book written by a parent and physician of a child with autism and it’s clear that my symptoms…
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Anxiety Bothers me the Most

Date 1 September 2018
Author Ilana Estelle
The hardest part of my life, isn’t cerebral palsy, it’s not getting the help I needed when I have spent the majority of my life living with anxiety, panic and overwhelming fear. Cerebral palsy doesn’t bother me, because I have understanding and am comfortable with it. There is no excuse,…
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New understandings

Date 29 August 2018
Author Ilana Estelle
Nine years after my initial cerebral palsy diagnosis at the age of forty-six, I am still putting pieces of the jigsaw together. Mild Cerebral Palsy Hemiparesis Thankfully, I now have a better understanding of my diagnosis. I have mild cerebral palsy hemiparesis (left side) caused by a bleed on the…
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No standard 'to work from'

Date 27 August 2018
Author Ilana Estelle
Growing up not knowing I had cerebral palsy, meant I had no standard or base line, from which I could judge by experiences, or which I could work from. Not knowing anything about my disability, meant that it was also difficult to explain how my symptoms presented in everyday ...
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Wilful Acts and Forgiveness

Date 23 August 2018
Author Ilana Estelle
It’s taken me eight plus years to work through my experiences. But one thing is for sure, I am not in the same emotional space before I started writing. I have come a long way. Understanding our experiences It is only when we work through our experiences and we’re looking…
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Complicit in Deceit

Date 20 August 2018
Author Ilana Estelle
There is no getting away from the fact that a diagnosis around the age of 2 of cerebral palsy, over the years there are those players who were by the very definition of knowing my diagnosis before me were complicit in deceit. I’m not sure what’s worse, someone or others…
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Another Jigsaw Piece

Date 17 August 2018
Author Ilana Estelle
I’ve been very open and honest about my struggles. I still continue to be open about my struggles and although I am okay, it comes at a cost when I continue to find out yet even more about myself. If nothing else I am honest I’ve also been honest about…
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Working With My Intuition

Date 13 August 2018
Author Ilana Estelle
Although I didn’t always make the correlation between my inward and outward thoughts growing up, I innately believed there was an external force around me, although I didn’t know what that meant. Whenever I was dealing with anxiety and bad thoughts, I would try to chant those thoughts away in…
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Please Support The CP Diary

Date 11 August 2018
Author Ilana Estelle
Given what we all deal with, supporting one another has never been so important. Through my blog, I show us how we can navigate our circumstances, make us feel better, whilst we continue to emotionally support one another. Being proactive is very much the key to us thinking about our…
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Accepting what I know

Date 7 August 2018
Author Ilana Estelle
I may never know now if knowing about my cerebral palsy diagnosis as a child will have helped me understand my presenting symptoms. I do know for sure I will have known about my inability to learn and about my intellect. Unless things have changed and doctors have moved further…
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Look for the silver lining

Date 4 August 2018
Author Ilana Estelle
I often take time to reflect on my experiences and know these experiences were always meant for me, but it’s not okay for those responsible to think it’s okay. No one should be subjected to neglect or abuse. There is always a message, a lesson that through each experience, we…
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